You don’t actually have to “become” anything to be successful or happy. You actually need to UN-BECOME all the BS stories that you’ve bought into over the years, or worse, have been told, and dig down deep and pull forth all the greatness that already lives inside of you.
Most of us have NO idea how capable we are of greatness. We tend to believe the “story” that we aren’t good enough, don’t deserve to be happy. That it isn’t our turn or our time. “I really want to do X but I have to wait for Y to happen”, “I’d do it if X wasn’t standing in my way”. “Once I do this or get that, then I’ll be able to do what I really want”. “That path is only for someone who is like XYZ”. or the best one … “I can’t do it now, maybe someday”. Ahhhhh hellooooooo?! That road called “Someday” leads to a place called NOWHERE.
Listen, I get it. I know the feeling really well because I was “that girl”. I was stuck in my head thinking that certain circumstances needed to be in place before I could do or even attempt the things I really wanted to do and worse, that I needed to be perfect before I started. Sound familiar?
But it’s not true. It’s a lie and that’s not your soul speaking. That’s your ego and fear talking, and it’s got a terrible grip on you. Think of fear like a face mask, it’s time to wipe it off. Tony Robbins said to me once, “When you’re in your head, your dead“. Read that again. When we’re in our head we’re dead. Because when we’re in our head, it’s our made up”story” of our limiting beliefs that cause us to suffer. When we can drop into our hearts, that’s where the magic happens friends.
It makes me sad when people, clients, friends tell me they have to put their lives on hold, their happiness on hold, their passions on hold until some magical day in the future. Until … ( fill in the blank ) I understand that you might be scared and uncertain of taking the leap. I was, too. But that magical day isn’t just going to present itself to you at some point in the future. It’s time to show up for yourself. Besides, no magic ever is created inside the walls of certainty.
If you want a life of magic you have to give up your addiction to certainty and your addiction to the stories that have gotten you here.
Magic is never planned, never controlled. I know right?! Geez, that hit me like a cosmic 2×4 to the head when I realized that, but it’s true. Think back to the most magical time in your life to date. I bet you were present and yet there was a world of uncertainty at your feet right? I also bet you were light in weight because you weren’t living in the past. See where I’m going with this? The biggest drug people struggle with is an addiction to problems.
The way out?
Start by identifying your toxic patterns, where your roadblocks are, where in your life your settling? (reminder: people don’t settle, dust settles and while we still have breath in our bodies, we are NOT dust) and then start to find alternate routes forward. Remember: Progress = Happiness. It will be tricky at first because your mind is more than likely currently trained to look for reasons why you can’t do something, so we must focus on retraining it to find the reasons why you can. Your fear’s detours are the longest way home. Accept what is. Release what was. Stay ready and open to what’s coming next, and coming from someone on the other side, let me tell you it’s light, magical and so worth the fight!
Most people live this way since it’s the path of least resistance. They make unconscious decisions, based on habit and conditioning, (the past) and are at the mercy of their own minds. They assume that it’s just an inevitable part of life to get frustrated, stressed, sad, angry and depressed—in other words, they live in a suffering state and give up on their dreams. But I’m happy to tell you there’s another path: one that involves directing your thoughts so that your mind does your bidding, not the other way around.
Most people have a highway to fear and a dirt road to happiness. Ever notice that?
But our lives are shaped not by our conditions, but by our decisions. If you think back on your life I’d be willing to bet that you can recall a decision or two that has truly changed your life. Maybe it was a decision about where to go to school, what career to pursue, or who you chose to love or marry. Looking back on it now, can you see how radically different your life would be today if you had made a different decision? These and so many other decisions determine the direction of your life and can change your destiny. We get in life what we tolerate. It’s our decisions, not our conditions, that ultimately shape the quality of our lives. But the good news is at any moment, the decision you make can change the course of your life forever!
Listen, you don’t need an excuse to feel good – you can feel good for no reason. Don’t let your future be your past on repeat. If you’re not happy with the way your life has turned out thus far, you always have the power to change who you are and who you want to become — in all facets of your life.
Instead of waiting for the perfect partner to be happy. Instead of waiting until you’ve lost the entire 50 pounds to be happy. Instead of waiting for your business hit $1M in revenue to be happy. Instead of waiting for your kids to leave the house … Focus on the continual progress you’re making every day and let that be your source of ongoing happiness.
Making progress on something you care deeply about will make you happy. And if you’re not making progress on something important now, that’s a great place to start.
Just ask yourself 2 simple questions:
- What’s important to me RIGHT NOW?
- What can I do to make progress on that, TODAY?
Be the curator of your thoughts. Remember, our thoughts are not real, they are the stories we tell ourselves and our minds believe whatever we feed it. Often, the thoughts that are negative, the voices of criticism in our head, are the same voices we heard growing up. Or are from a toxic relationship you found yourself in the middle of. So, knowing that they’re not you, you can separate yourself from them and choose to redirect your thoughts towards good things. You do have the power to change how you think, and in turn, change your life.
I used to think I had so far to go to “become” the person I wanted to be, when in reality…I just needed to start instead of merely existing, waiting for that elusive permission to be granted, or for someone to finally say it was my turn! Nope! Friends, today, right here, right now… it’s all we got!
Wings do work but only after you jump. Mountains can be moved, but only after you try. The life you desire does exist, but only if you dare to create it and embrace it and say YES to it when it arrives.
So I ask you, what are you no longer willing to tolerate?
Make your move! I’m with you!